The Beginning of the Great Rebellion 2013

This week 10,000 people rushed to the streets of Castlebar, the capital of Mayo, to show support of the ongoing rebellion. The confirmed devil worshipper and traitor to the Republic of Mayo now dictator, Enda Kenny, ordered the army of Ireland to fire tear gas into the crowd who held signs saying 'Down with this sort of thing'.

Priests showing their support to the Catholic Republic of Mayo at the Mall, Castlebar.

After hours of slaps being thrown with one pair of wellies confirmed to be damaged, the evil army decided to retreat to the now EU owned Dublin. The people of Mayo are now planning to attack an aggressive attack on Dublin. Michael Ring has said his army of 40,000+ soldiers will march upon Ireland's headquarters of Croke Park this Sunday.

The violent scenes in Mayo this week.

                       

A Brief History of Mayo Sports

Mayos hurling record is poor mainly because the technology required to make hurls is not available. However its footballers have been very successful winning every All-Ireland title since 1951, except in 1999 when the team fell foul to a mild dose of smallpox, in 2004 when the Country was too busy celebrating its Independence from the Republic of Ireland five years celebration and in 2006 when the Kerry Team put Laxitives in their tea before the match leaving many of the Mayo Players missing off the pitch for long periods of time. The team used to be managed by a nobody Blue-shirt John O'Mahoney who is from Kilmovee/Ballaghaderreen/Cant decide and who is also a TD. By seizing control of both politics and sport he hoped to eventually take control of the country in a bloody coup as he secretly hates Blue-shirt leader Enda Kenny, brother of the less attractive Kenny from South Park and Pat Kenny who denies he is from Mayo. Among the most prominent players in the county is Conor Mortimer, known for his love of Michael Jackson, his perfect spelling, his safe driving, and his extreme modesty. Other famous players include Willie Joe Padden who struck so much fear into Galwegians that they "hadn't a hope of batein Mayo" and Ciaran McDonald as well known for hid luscious blonde locks as his superb footballing ability.